Happy Noel

I haven't posted for a while and I know that you, my fans, wait with eager anticipation for my latest utterances. Hopefully, this will appease you over the Christmas period as you get fatter and fall out with people you quite like.

I've been lucky enough to be working over Christmas, which has by and large actually involved work, something I wasn't banking on. Three days of pissing around with lunch breaks longer than the work day itself was my plan, but sadly not.

Anyway, happy new year to you all. I'm off to a fancy dress party in Bristol, the theme being personalities from the news in 2005. Ideas: the woman who had a face transplant (easy: wear a mask); Roy Keane (pram and projectile teddies); the Pope (wear a white sheet and talk in Italian); the French Olympic bid (stripy top, onions, etc., and a big L on the forehead...)